Looking Back After #12

I finished my 12th and (hopefully) final treatment of full chemotherapy this week. It's likely that I will have to do maintenance chemo after surgery. But compared to what I have done already that should be much easier. It will be one chemo drug instead of four, one hour treatment instead of three days, and possibly less frequent too.  Compared to the stories I've been told by other cancer patients and the people I see at chemo, I feel like I had it pretty easy. My side effects were mild to moderate and were more annoying than debilitating. The odd thing is that the side effects and intensity varied between each treatment. It was like spinning the wheel on Wheel of Fortune. I never knew what I would land on. Fatigue and cold sensitivity in my mouth have been consistent, but the rest have varied with each treatment:

Heartburn

No appetite

Tingling fingers

Numb fingers

Cold sensitivity in fingers

Tingling toes

Clumsiness

Dry mouth

Nosebleeds

Hair thinning

Fever

Chemo brain

Missing from this list is nausea and vomiting. That is a blessing and has a lot to do with my positive attitude. I hate throwing up. So much so that I can generally will myself not to. If I had to go to chemo every other week knowing I would be throwing up and downing Phenagren, I would have been a much crankier patient.

The first chemo was pretty rough. I was exhausted from the previous week's appointments, scans, port install, etc. Plus I was mentally overwhelmed by everything. I think I slept for three days. After that treatments got easier because I knew what to expect, and the symptoms were milder too. 

Knowing what to expect and being able to plan for it helped Sara too. She knew Nana would be here to help, that there would be a trip to Sonic and likely shopping, and that it would pass in a few days.  She didn't like to see me sick and weak but she realized after a few treatments that it wouldn't last long. She has had emotional moments and worried this was "going to last forever". Six months is an eternity to a 9-year old. But mostly she has been a trooper through it all. Her strength has helped me stay strong and I'm sure it goes the other way as well. 

I met with my oncologist last week and planned for a PET scan to evaluate the success of treatment thus far. Then I will meet with my surgeon again. We will discuss all the details I was too stunned to think about back in December. Honestly, the only thing I remember from my first meeting with the surgeon is the two-hour wait in the waiting room and hearing that the tumors were operable and my liver will regenerate after surgery. And I got to see my CT scan which was cool. This time I'll have a list of questions. I'm ready for the next phase of treatment and glad to be done with chemo if only for a little while.  

All in all, things look good, and my heart is full of gratitude.